Not ready!

So, my sweet little 5 year old is starting Kindergarten the day after tomorrow.  Needless to say, I am not ready!

I know it sounds cheesy, but I remember the day he was born.  He was sooo sweet...he had the most perfect round face you've ever seen.  He was the Polaroid of perfection.  8lbs, 3oz, 19 3/4 inches long.  Born on December 15th, 2004 at 12:37pm, and healthy as he could be.  I was only 20, but I knew from the moment I was pregnant that I was meant to be his mom.  I never complained about waking up in the night, getting no sleep, having surgery to have him, etc.  It was all worth it to have my Kaden!  And now...now he is his own person.  He is growing so much and so fast, I can hardly believe it.

Sometimes, I wish his real dad would make more of an effort to be in his life.  But at the same time, all he does is lie to Kaden and tell him things that he is too young to know.  In the end my child will be heartbroken when "daddy" is supposed to come and never does.  

I think the hardest part about being a mom is loving them too much.  You want so badly the best for them, and when it doesn't happen it just breaks your heart.  You want so badly to give them everything you never had...and when you can't, it breaks your heart too.

All I can do, is the possible, and trust God with the impossible.

I love my kids.

<3 Jamie Lee